Count your many blessings angels will attend.

Feeling kind of down tonight. So since I know this is a wonderful way to lift my spirit (and I just watched the video here http://waterislife.com/ about first world problems) I think I shall list some things I can thank God for.

1. High speed internet.  I waste many an hour in front of my laptop, but one day I will see the first image of my sons or daughter's faces because I have it.

2. My new house... I'm pretty sure that I've listed this on the blog several times, but here I am 7 months in and still glad everyday that God has given me this beautiful house.

3. My husband.  I am so very thankful for him.  For his wisdom, for his work ethic, for his humor.  For so many things.  God knew the right partner for me and gave him to me early, now I must wait for the rest of my family to come but at least I have a pretty awesome guy by my side on this wait.

4. My parents.  This last year has been really hard on my parents, my Dad especially.  I cannot go into details on the blog but this trouble that they are facing is one of the many reasons I am down today.  But as I watch my parents grow older and SHOWER love and attention on their grandkids I am so blessed.  As I watch them navigate their mothers' aging I am given another wonderful example of how to live my life.

5. My sisters and brothers.  They are my best friends.  They are where I go to vent, to celebrate, to just be.  I can't imagine my life without each of them.

6. My puppies, who are outside barking their heads off.... okay now inside and keeping me company every night.  They make me smile daily and are always there for me.

7. I'm thankful for the food in my pantry, fridge, and freezer.  When I'm in a mood like tonight I find it difficult to figure out "what to cook" but I am thankful for the options and know that there are many without options and others without any food at all.

8. I am thankful for people who are working in this world to make it a better place.  Whether they are fellow teachers finding ways to show love to students who needs it, or people working to end the sex slave trade, I am thankful for others because they help me to see that there is still good in this crazy world.

9.  I am thankful for books.  I am thankful that I can read and find out about people anywhere and everywhere..

10. I am thankful that when I am down I can go to my Father and feel His love and know that "I'm not home yet, this is not where I belong.  Take this world and give me Jesus."

Yep, just what I needed on this night.

Psalm 23:5

You prepare a feast for me in the presence of my enemies. You honor me by anointing my head with oil. My cup overflows with blessings.

Granny

My granny has had Alzheimer's for several years now.  I must admit that since her "loop" has become so short I have avoided spending time with her.  It makes me sad that she cannot recognize that my siblings and I are adults.  It makes me sad that she can't remember whose kids those are even though they were just introduced to her.  Bottom line: It makes me sad and uncomfortable so I avoid it.

Enter a couple weeks ago when Granny (who had been living on her own with my aunt checking up on her) entered the hospital really sick.  She has some issues with paranoia and other people (these came way before the Alzheimer's) so when she was released to the nursing home for rehabilitation, the family wanted to transition her easier so someone in the family (which is huge but the pool of people willing to stay is small) spends the night with her each night.

While visiting her the first Sunday that she was there, it came up that they needed someone to stay the next Friday.  I felt compelled to volunteer.  I just was hit with the fact that this woman had done so much for us and now she needed us so we each needed to do our part to help her feel safe and loved in this part of her life.  So I said, yeah I can come next Friday night and stay the night.  (This is easier for me because Josh works seconds and because I don't have kids to worry about childcare).  However, after the thought came to my mind, but before I said yes the idea that something would go wrong and I couldn't handle it came into my mind.  I still said yes.  The worry still plagued me all week.  I asked for prayers at work and bible study and small group about it.

So I went and she was fine.  She didn't ever get agitated which was my biggest fear.  My dad's cousin had said that while you're there you get no sleep, and I definitely agree with that since when they brought her meds at 5:00am she was ready to be up for the day.  She was great Friday night.  I had brought her a picture from this Christmas of her and her 6 adult children.  She would study it and tell me how old they looked.  And how bald my dad is, and how that is just like his dad.  I brought her flowers and we would look at them and talk about how beautiful they are.  I tried to get her to tell me about my dad as a kid.  The only thing I got was that he was the quiet, studious one (not really surprising there).  It was a good visit.

Saturday morning was harder.  She was obsessed with going back home... but not to the home she had been in since I was born but the one that she raised her kids in.  It made her mopey.  (remember how I hate when she's sad).  My mom and aunt were both texting me about how things were going and suggested a change of location.  We walked down the hall and saw the aviary there.  That broke the mopey spell.  After lunch my sister and her kids, then my cousin, then my uncle came and finally my shift was done.

I was so blessed by all who prayed for me.  I feel like they did shelter me.  While I'm sure that Granny was comforted by my presence (she asked me not to leave), I think it was so good for ME for me to go and spend the night.  Like I said, I've just been ignoring the issue.  Which never helps an issue.  But it was good to go and spend that time with my Granny.  Although I'm sure she didn't remember it once I was gone it was good that for the time I was there I could be a comfort to her.  It was good that she knew that she could trust me and that I loved her.  I'm glad I got the opportunity to be with her.

Genesis 17:7

“I will confirm my covenant with you and your descendants after you, from generation to generation. This is the everlasting covenant: I will always be your God and the God of your descendants after you.

Still working

I mentioned a couple of months ago that I was trying to lose some weight and needed to be accountable.  December is so very hard to be accountable in.  Since I ran my second 5k I have been slowly and not quite as steadily losing and exercising.

Unfortunately being a teacher and aunt in December means nearly every night has something plus people are always trying to give me food (especially chocolate).  The first three days this week were really bad, mostly because I had to stay late to get everything done for the semester.

I had gotten behind because last Friday I left half day to come home and do my home study update.  That went well.  We had to do it for 2 reasons.  One for immigration because our other one is running out soon and also because we moved this summer and our social worker had to make sure our new home was suitable for children.

So I was behind on grading and then this week was just a busy mess! On Wednesday I baked cookies with my students which is my favorite way ever to celebrate the holidays.  We made chocolate chip cookies and I ate way too many!

Anyway, yesterday I was super bad and although I had no work still didn't fit in any exercise (although for the most part my eating was more on track).  Today I got up determined not to put it (and this blog for that matter) on the back burner again.  So I went to pinterest where yesterday I had pinned this:



And while the doggies were outside frolicking in the first snow of the winter (yay! we didn't all die last night), I did this.  Man did it get everything on fire.  So I should definitely add this into the mix (because if I do the same thing or eat the same thing daily I get burnt out super quickly).  Hopefully I'll work up to being able to do twice a day but I think for a busy just quick workout it hit the spot.

So accountability, I am down about 30 lbs from last summer.  I had school pictures in September and sent them out in my Christmas cards to my students this week (ps why do I get a full package of school pictures every year? who am I going to hand 30 wallets, 2 5x7s, and an 8x10 to?  I am not really that narcissistic).  It was pretty cool because I could see the difference between my face in September and now.  Just have to remember that and not let laziness (probably my number one sin, pray for me) get me off track.

A friend put this on facebook last night:


I think it applies to oh so many things.  I am currently waiting to hit my healthy goal with eating and exercising, it is not something that will happen immediately and I don't know why we always think it will.  I am also waiting, waiting, waiting for God to grow my family because I know He will.  I know His ways are above mine and that this wait is helping me to depend on Him.  Thank you God for your willingness to work with me, to prod me, and to lead me.  Amen.

Isaiah 64:4

New Living Translation (NLT)

⁴ For since the world began,
    no ear has heard
and no eye has seen a God like you,
    who works for those who wait for him!

Thankful for good people in this world.

Remember how I posted that Saturday the weather was super gorgeous?  I went to a local park with my sister and went running.  I don't have a cool id for running so I just stuck my driver's license in my pocket.  I also had my pedometer in a pocket and my cell phone.  We listed to music and tracked our run using my phone.  My sister challenged me to run beyond what I thought I could and that was awesome.  I ended my run at the bottom of a lookout tower, head pressed against the cool concrete.  Betsy went to the top of the tower and I walked circles at the bottom.  As I walked circles at the bottom, I put my hand in my pocket to check for my stuff.  I still had my phone and my pedometer but I had no id.  Most of our run had been in a loop so after we searched the car we went back over the parts that we hadn't doubled over already.  It was no where to be found.  I thought maybe it had fallen out at home?  But alas it wasn't there.  Monday the BMV was closed. Tuesday I didn't go because of other things.  Last night I get home after work, working for Operation Christmas Child,  and going to Bible study I get the mail.  There is an envelope to me from someone I don't know in a neighboring town.  She found my id at the park Saturday and mailed it back to me.  There are good people in this world and for that I'm thankful.

Proverbs 11:3
Honesty guides good people; dishonesty destroys treacherous people.

Thankful for...

Tonight I'm thankful for Pinterest.  Where else can I while away the hours finding ideas for my home and my future?

Like this one:



Psalm 84:3
Even the sparrow finds a home, and the swallow builds her nest and raises her young at a place near your altar, O LORD of Heaven’s Armies, my King and my God!

A Week of Thankfulness

I really was trying that first week... and then I slacked off and now I need to catch up on a whole week's worth of posts.

Nov 7-- Thankful for Faraday

My little puppy last fall has turned into a great big Giant puppy this fall.

Most evenings it is just the two of us relaxing, taking walks much to the chagrin of the not as nice dogs next door, playing fetch indoors and out.  We lost both of our previous pooches last year and I am so thankful we were able to get Faraday to help keep me company this last year.  His first year had a lot of excitement, eating a month's worth of medication, moving twice, and making friends wherever he goes.  

1 Samuel 25:16
In fact, day and night they were like a wall of protection to us and the sheep.

November 8

Thankful for Josh.

He tops my thankfulness list daily.  He has been my best friend for over 11 years and my husband more than 6.  He works so hard to provide nice things for us and I truly appreciate it daily.  I also appreciate the time we get to spend together, working on things for the house, going camping or traveling, playing games, hosting our annual Halloween bash.  I prayed to God for my husband and he has blessed me so completely.

The other day when setting up our Thanksgiving mantle I was searching for a picture for a new frame.  I went through the wedding album and found this one which I just love.  It's not the one in the frame now but it did bring a smile to my face.

Romans 12:10
Love each other with genuine affection, and take delight in honoring each other.

Election Day Thankfulness

Here's a picture of me today with my I voted today sticker.  I am so thankful that I was able to put forth my opinions on who should be the next president of our nation, governor of my state, superintendent of education in Indiana, and Senator from Indiana.  I am also very thankful for the thousands of people nation-wide who worked the polls and helped people to exercise their right to vote.  I was lucky to be able to walk right in, show my ID, and go straight to a voting machine this afternoon.  While I was there one of the ladies checking ID mentioned that she had been there since 5am.  That makes for a very long day.  I am so thankful for her and other volunteers who helped to make this and every past election a pretty "painless" process.


Proverbs 22:29
Do you see any truly competent workers? They will serve kings rather than working for ordinary people.

Bonus thought for the day:  I am so Glad Jesus is my king no matter what happens in the election today.

Thankful for my parents and siblings.

Today, and everyday, I am thankful for my siblings and parents.  I have 3 brothers and 3 sisters and a mom and a dad.  I love each of them.  I get together regularly with them.  I am so proud of who we have all turned out to be.  I pray that I can provide my children with as much love and good guidance as my parents gave all of us.  I think we are kind of like rocks in a stream.  We bump against each other and wear off those rough parts so that the world gets to see the shiny smoothness.  We are each others' greatest fans and I wouldn't have it any other way.  This picture idea I got from Pinterest.  My mom free cut the letters and then my sister set it up (she's the awesome photographer and her label thingy is on the picture).  I love it!  Don't you?

Psalm 105:8
He always stands by his covenant— the commitment he made to a thousand generations.

Thankful for Orphan Sunday

Today was Orphan Sunday around the world.  Unfortunately our church didn't have anything special for Orphan Sunday, but I still think it is so important and I am so thankful for it.  I think it serves a purpose because God has called us as Christians to support the widow and the orphan.  This won't mean through adoption for most families.  However, if God has placed this call upon your heart and then you go to church and hear/learn more about it it might be that nudge you need in order to follow God's plans for your life and your family.  I know that God had placed adoption in my heart long before we started the process.  I know that the process has been way too long by my estimates and will be just exactly the right amount of time in God's, but I also think that without exposure to adoption in my life (I nannied for a family with 3 beautiful, wonderful boys fro Guatemala), I might not yet be following God's will.  Adoption is hard and scary, especially for people with no history of interactions with adoption, perhaps through Orphan Sunday God can help people to overcome their fears and take that first step that completes their families.  Praise God for such an opportunity.

James 1:27
Pure and genuine religion in the sight of God the Father means caring for orphans and widows in their distress and refusing to let the world corrupt you. 

Ps.... Once I actually move my church membership and this adoption thing finally works out, I do plan to bring up Orphan Sunday to my church :)

Thankful for my treadmill

  Today I am thankful for my treadmill, it looks something like this only without the weights.  We bought it several years ago in loo of another gym membership that we wouldn't get enough use out of.  In its life with us it has had seasons of use and seasons of unuse (although never has it been a clothes rack).  Right now it is back in use.  I used it to prepare for the last 5k I ran and today since it is cold, wet, and yucky outside I am gonna lace up the sneakers and head down to the basement to show a little love to the treadmill and my body.

Proverbs 4:12
When you walk, you won’t be held back; when you run, you won’t stumble.

Thankful for my small group.

Kinda a rough last two days at work, but small group was tonight and it was nice sitting and talking with people and digging into the Word.  Last year Josh and I started looking for a new church and one of my criteria were small groups to get involved in.  It's taken awhile but now I am in a small group and I really feel like it is a gift from God to me to help me along my journey.  Thank you Jesus for fellowship with believers.

Acts 2:42
All the believers devoted themselves to the apostles’ teaching, and to fellowship, and to sharing in meals, and to prayer.

November Thankfulness

I'm going to try to write each day in November at least posting what I'm thankful for.

To start the month, I am so so thankful this year for our new house!

God has truly blessed us.

Psalm 101:2
I will be careful to live a blameless life— when will you come to help me? I will lead a life of integrity in my own home.

Beginning

I saw this idea on Pinterest to use these as motivators on a weight loss journey.  Each rock represents a pound that you need to lose.  When it's gone, the rock gets to move to the lost vase.  I like that my "to go" vase is short and fat but my "lost" vase is tall and skinny.  It's the goal :) I made them then almost took them to my master bath but decided instead to leave them on the kitchen counter to help motivate me not to have that extra food I don't need in the kitchen.  So far I've been losing pretty consistently which is great.  I ran my second 5k last month.  Didn't run as much as I had during the first one but two of my brothers and one of my sisters ran it with me.  And when I wanted to give up near the end my brother came back and finished it with me so I could finish strong!  I love the feeling of accomplishment I get when I finish so I need to get back into training so that I can do another one. Since then I haven't done as well on getting my exercise in but have done really well on eating appropriately.  I have gained and lost weight several times in the years since high school and even won a weight loss competition a couple years ago with Josh and some siblings.  But I haven't been consistent and I don't want to continue the unhealthy cycle.  Right now Josh is once again in a competition but I chose to not join because I need to make it just a part of my life.  Eating healthy foods and exercising regularly need to be just something I do and not something I do because if I do I can gain money.  More than money I need to be in good health, happy, not spending money on unhealthy things (it adds up) and able to be the best mama I can be when God finally grants me that desire of my heart.  So I guess I also need to have some accountability and that's why I'm writing this.  I also need some accountability to writing on this blog so I'm going to try to do them both.  No promises.

In other news last week marked 1 year of officially being on the list.  We started at 85 and after a year...Hopefully referrals pick up and we move many more than 25 in the next year.  I so cannot wait to see their precious faces.


1 Peter 1:13 So think clearly and exercise self-control. Look forward to the gracious salvation that will come to you when Jesus Christ is revealed to the world.

African

So we continue waiting.  And with the recent updates from CHI and the continuing lack of referrals in 2012, it seems that we will be waiting a long time more for our children to find us.  Last weekend our town had its annual "Ethnic Expo" and we were able to go on Saturday.  It reminded me of a regular "market" that we might encounter on our travels because mostly it was shops of things to buy from different countries and food prepared by people from different countries.  There were no Ethiopian shops or food but there were a couple from Ghana.  We saw these cool djembes at one of the shops.  The one we really liked had a lion carved into the base.  We talked to the guy and then walked around more.  The other Ghana shop had some pretty cool carvings and paintings that we were interested in but we just looked around and didn't buy anything.  Then we had dinner. I had jollof rice and chicken stew from the Ghana tent and Josh had some meat from the Brazilian tent.  We saw a couple of different dancers and listened to some music.  It was an enjoyable experience.  Then we went back to the original Ghana shop and got ourselves a little piece of African decor.  The lion one was gone so we got this one with a gazelle on one side and a tree on the other.  Waiting is difficult but getting new things like this excites me.  During this time I am trying to depend more on God because without Him the wait would be impossible.   I looked for a verse with drums and found this: 1 Samuel 10:5-6
“Next, you’ll come to Gibeah of God, where there’s a Philistine garrison. As you approach the town, you’ll run into a bunch of prophets coming down from the shrine, playing harps and tambourines, flutes and drums. And they’ll be prophesying. Before you know it, the Spirit of GOD will come on you and you’ll be prophesying right along with them. And you’ll be transformed. You’ll be a new person!

I pray that God uses this time of waiting to transform me. To make me the person that my children will need. God is in control and today I am depending on Him for endurance during this wait.

Ups and Downs

So the endless period of no referrals finally ended in June which was a very good think.  I think as of today we are either 67 or 66 on the waiting list so that's awesome.  I've been able to think about some great "ups" that this extended wait has given us.

 We hated the house we were living in so we contacted a realtor about selling it.  He pretty much dashed all expectations of selling it and even getting what we owed on it :(  But we did have a neighbor who owned land adjacent to ours but was having difficulty getting the government to approve him putting in a house.  We contacted him just to see if he was interested.  He was very interested!  He said I have to sell my current house but then I want yours.... so we were back in the waiting game.  Then he called us this Spring saying I need the house ASAP.  So Josh and I moved out and in with my parents

(picture from my sister's photography business: http://www.klassicelegancephotography.com/)

We went from a house to one room but other than lack of space it's been great and it gave us time to search out our dream home:

It is definitely a place that we can't wait to bring our babies home to!  Unfortunately, we won't get to move in until next week but I am so very thankful to God that we sold our old house, had my parents to depend upon during the transition, and were able to find and purchase our dream home.  I know that if God had made our wait time shorter that this dream wouldn't have been a reality so I am choosing to concentrate on the blessings that I have each day.

I finished my first year of teaching.  It was a long year and also a very short one.  I learned a lot from my fellow teachers and from my administrator.  This is also a blessing.  

This summer I have taught 2 different summer schools and the large age differences has also helped me to grow as a teacher.  I won't continue summer school once the kiddos get here so growing as a teacher and gaining experience is a blessing (although an actual break would be a blessing too)

We also have in this time of waiting joined a new church.  Which has led me to join a Women's Bible Study. Which has led me to be better committed to my quiet time.  Which is such a blessing.  Thank you God for the blessings during my wait.

Isaiah 30:18
So the LORD must wait for you to come to him so he can show you his love and compassion. For the LORD is a faithful God. Blessed are those who wait for his help. 

Mother's Day

I always thought I was a writer.  I enjoy writing but haven't put enough time into this blog.  One reason I think is because I made the blog to blog about adoption and well there isn't much news on that front.  Since October (when we officially made the waiting list) we've moved about 10 spots (from 85 to what I guess is 73 but I haven't checked officially).  That in itself isn't overly optimistic.  If you then break it down further to the fact that in 2012 our agency has had 1 referral (it was of siblings so that's something) then it feels much more bleak given that it's nearly halfway through May.  Also that Mother's Day is this weekend just puts me in a bad mood.  If I had a big old baby belly people would treat me like a mother but since I am only paper pregnant, it won't be so. People do care and ask about the adoption but I don't have any answers and thinking about it too much makes me so depressed because... it may be a year, it may be 2 it may even be 5 and that's a lot to swallow.  I know God has called me to adopt.  That there is a reason my heart breaks for the children without families.  That there is a reason for this time of WAITING with no end insight.  I know that.  But I have to remind myself every day.


Romans 8:23 And not only this, but also we ourselves, having the first fruits of the Spirit, even we ourselves groan within ourselves, waiting eagerly for our adoption as sons, the redemption of our body.

New Years Resolution....

So I read this cool blog post at the very beginning of the year:  On Friendship http://www.incourage.me/2011/12/on-friendship.html

And I felt like it had been written just for me.  Once again January has brought a new health kick (but I am feeling more even-keeled this time so maybe it will stick) but even though I struggle with "lack of friends" I hadn't thought about making it a resolution.  I definitely pray for it and it is one of the reasons that I started my search for a new church.  Hopefully one of the things I will find in my new congregation is a way to make new lasting friendships.  I hate making small talk.  It's actually gotten me in some real trouble at the job (apparently parents want bubbly teachers... and I try but I'm just not).  But I'm going to follow this blog series ( is that what you call it when she does a couple on the same topic) and think about the ways I can make more friends in 2012.

Luke 16:9  Here’s the lesson: Use your worldly resources to benefit others and make friends. Then, when your earthly possessions are gone, they will welcome you to an eternal home.

Hope

On October 19th, we entered the waiting list at number 85.  I am happy to report that in the last few months, over 10 families have had the happy moment of getting that referral.  Unfortunately, I don't think there has been a referral of a sibling group all year long.  Also throughout the year the process has seemed to get longer and had more than a few setbacks.  When we were placed on the list they told us they couldn't give us an exact timeline but because we are wanting siblings (for multiple reasons) they would guess that our timeline until referral is likely 2 years.  So 24-2 months= 22 more months.

Somehow doing paperwork and waiting for the government to do paperwork and answering questions about my life all seemed like doing something and made the whole thing "real".  Right now I kind of feel like it isn't "real" anymore.  In 22 mos, who knows what will have happened, how I will have changed, what I will be feeling.... who knows how life will have changed in 22 mos.  And in 22 mos (if it works out that 22 is all we have to wait) I won't be holding my precious children in my arms but will instead just be finding out their names and faces.  It's bothersome to me because it seems like so many things have to wait for the babies and I want the babies so bad and all these people around me are getting pregnant and their babies will be here long before mine.  So a little bit of a pity party for Rachael (and for all the other "mothers" in the world just waiting to get the chance).

But... it is advent.  One part of my job that I loved was last Friday, we had a birthday party for Jesus.  We did have just a bit of work in the morning and then we worked our way through the advent.  We talked about how advent is a celebration of the "waiting", the waiting for the first Christmas and the waiting for the Second Coming.  Can I just tell you that if I were to celebrate something, it wouldn't be waiting.  I love celebrating but I don't love waiting.  But alas I think that some of God's greatest lessons come to us during times of waiting.

And I keep thinking about the Israelites who had to wait 400 years for their Messiah and then people missed it.  I've been checking out new churches (just time for a change) and think I've found the one I want and last week our sermon was on Simeon's song.  Simeon had a promise from God that he would see the Messiah and when he did he worshipped him and sang a song.  Simeon kept that hope, that faith that God would give him the desire of his heart and it came.  There is no age given but I get the impression that Simeon was not a young guy.  He probably had to wait longer than that 22 mos.  but he knew that God would keep his promise to Israel and to him personally.  The pastor said on Sunday that if you think about it that the story of Simeon is sad because Simeon wasn't the only on in the temple that day, the temple was packed with people with their own agendas who in the back of their minds were "waiting for the Messiah" but they missed him.  I want to make sure that I am not missing the point in this waiting and that I am prepared and not so stuck in my own pity party that I lose out on what God has for me during this waiting.  I know that my trust, my hope, my faith is in the Lord and he will deliver me from this time, from these worries, from the uncertainties that can cause me to waver.

I found great comfort in the blogpost at the bottom check it out.  Merry Christmas!

John 14:18 No, I will not abandon you as orphans—I will come to you


http://www.incourage.me/2011/12/because-what-were-really-getting-ready-for-is-love.html

Officially Waiting :D

So... the birth certificate, marriage license, and not-right-notary were not the end of our troubles.  We go to mail our stuff only to have our consultant leave the country but they assured us that if we sent it they would take care of it.  So we sent it and they found out our police report was too old (this gathering paperwork has taken a long time.  2 full-time jobs one of which is on an off-shift has really messed this stuff up).

So then I go to the local police to see if I can just get both of our letters but nope they won't let me get Josh's.  They say just leave your info and your husband can come tomorrow and get it done.  Then Josh worked over so he didn't make it that day but he did the next and so I thought we'd mail it back off that night.  I go to get the paperwork and mines not there they told him he couldn't have it.  So another day went by before I got back over to the police station to get that straightened out and once again in the mail.

Woohoo everything was there but there was still one more step before "paper pregnancy" was really here.  I wonder how long this last step takes so I ask and my consultant says probably within the next week or two.  That same day I get an email that we are on the list! On the list! Officially paper pregnant!! Woohoo! So then I have to know, what number on the list are we? 85... So I can't wait for those 84 other families to be complete so that we can too.

Since we are waiting for siblings we have a pretty big wait ahead of us.  An elephant has a gestation time of 22 months.  So the bet is on, who will win an elephant who got pregnant last week or me and Josh?  Any takers?

Isaiah 40:31 Yet those who wait for the LORD Will gain new strength; They will mount up with wings like eagles, They will run and not get tired, They will walk and not become weary. 

Not "Waiting" Yet :(

I have been terrible at blogging, and not because I have nothing to say.  I have been terrible because I spend every evening at school really late and then have no desire to turn the laptop back on when I get home.  I finally started being a "real" teacher.  I am in charge of 19 little minds and getting all the information into them that they need to learn in 3rd grade.  I am excited that part of my job is leading my students to Jesus everyday.  I love when I can connect the curriculum with what we've learned in Bible.  I also love that I can ask, "Is this what Jesus would want us to do? Is that speaking in kindness to our friends?"  My beginning has not been without its pitfalls and every time I think that this biggest pitfall has been overcome it seems to rear its head again, so any prayers on that would be greatly appreciated, but I love feeling like I am where God wants me.  It was awesome my first day because it just felt so normal and peaceful.

I am getting slightly better at not staying at work until very late at night but I am having a hard time coming home alone.  My dog was ran over by a neighbor a couple of weeks ago and since then it has been even harder to convince myself to go home to the empty house.  I know that God knows what he's doing, and probably Josh wouldn't have as many opportunities for overtime if he worked first shift, but I am so over being on opposite shifts.  I either don't get enough sleep and am grouchy all the time or don't see Josh and am therefore grouchy all the time.  I don't like going out to people's houses every night but then get frustrated if I'm home alone.  I try to do the "Paul" thing and be content no matter my circumstances, but I definitely find these circumstances to be trying.  But just when I am complaining to God about how I hate it, He had someone share their family story with me that had me shutting up and thanking Him right then for the great man He has put in my life.  I am not sure why I am so lucky to have a guy who works so hard for me or values my happiness so but I am glad that I do.

What else... well my sister had a stroke.  At 31.  Over Labor Day weekend when we were supposed to be camping.  I didn't even know 31 yr olds had strokes.  I was so so scared and then so so thankful to God for His healing.  A million different "coincidences" happened that day that prevented it from being so much worse and I praise God for each of them.  She's doing pretty good now although not quite up to speed (and a little ditzy which isn't normal) but the doctors still haven't given a definite diagnosis and plan of action.  So again I would covet prayers for that.

Finally I thought I would be an official "waiting family" this week.  I finally had all the paperwork for my dossier and then mailed it off to Indiana's Secretary of State.  I get it back in less than a week (with a holiday weekend in the middle, Gold Star for SOS) but alas I am not ready.  They refused to certify 3 of my papers.  I want to complain about all 3.  If you've had enough of my complaining, feel free to skip, but I must get it out!

I was told by my adoption consultant and other adoptive moms that I needed to go to Indianapolis to get my official official birth certificate.  So I did.  I went to the department of health (which has a super dumb address and my droid was being dumb at showing me at street/walking level where it was) walk in with all my identifications and marriage license so I can get Josh's also only to be told, "Oh, we don't do that here anymore you need to go to the county you were born in." So I ask to confirm that this will be the official one because I was told to go to Indianapolis and they assure me this is the way the state is doing this now.  So then on a different day I drive the 2 counties over to where both Josh and I were born (another random "coincidence" I found out that day we were even delivered by the same doctor).  I find their vital records department, go in prove who I am and she gets me the birth certificates.  While there I explain I need these for international adoption and had been told to go to Indy but Indy said come there so these would be the most official ones, right? She assures me they are what I need.  Unfortunately for me she and the people in Indy are WRONG!!! I have to go to some random website enter my info, upload my identification (seems like a wonderful method for identity theft to me), and they ups'd me the birth certificates.  That only took another week.  After the 2 days and hundreds of miles I drove.  For the birth certificates I wish I knew where to officially complain because I would.  Because I covered all my bases and asked and asked and was still wrongly informed.  But such is life in this broken world we live in and God knows the plan so I/my babies must need the extra time that those birth certificates have given us.

Then they also returned my marriage license.  It was returned because the certification (stamp whatever it is called) and signature of the clerk on it were over 3 years old.  This is because it's the first official one I received when I got married 5 years ago and nothing in any documentation told me I needed to have a newer one.  This is a little ridiculous to me since marriage licenses don't expire! C'est la vie.

The final thing returned was one of the letters we had notarized.  Apparently something is wrong with this notary's (who works at a bank) stamp.  Her dates are all wrong so she doesn't work so the letter had to be reprinted and renotarized.  Since I have no way of knowing this before sending it to the SOS I pray that the new notary is acceptable.

I have the new birth certificates and the new notarized letter.  I just have to find time (or hopefully Josh can find time) to get to the courthouse in a town we don't live in.  As soon as we get that we will mail those 3 items back to the SOS who hopefully will once again have great turn around so we can finally mail that dossier and be an official "Waiting" family.

Psalm 27:14 Wait patiently for the Lord. Be brave and courageous. Yes, wait patiently for the Lord